Lots of stuff has been going on, mostly good things!
Social: I’ve been leaving the house and hanging out with people! Which means I need to give a few people some nicknames. (Pause…) Done. I even made a page for my cast of characters. Yesterday I hung out with Zelda for like 6 hours. Her friend Domino joined us for lunch, and we hit it off too, and then the three of us spent like an hour in Joanns gleefully shopping for 70% off Halloween decorations. Last Sunday I had coffee in the morning with Rose for two hours, and then spend the afternoon with Zelda. I am such a social butterfly.
Hellooooooo nurse: I’ve been contemplating having a sex life again. I don’t want love, but friendship with benefits would be awesome. I’ve even been flirting with people. Shocking.
Brain Fun: doing fairly well on most days. There was a four-day depressive streak last week during which I only left the house once. And the week before that I struggled with occasional bursts of impulsive recklessness. Like, “if I ride my bike down this 65mph highway, it’s not like I’m actually attempting suicide, right? I mean, it has a bike lane…” But mostly I’m okay.
Thursday I started decreasing my Lamictal dosage. I’ve been on 200mg twice a day for years, and I’m fed up with the severe memory loss it causes. I’ve forgotten almost everything I learned in college. I don’t remember most of my childhood. The memories are still there, I just can’t access them. (Thanks to my psych degree and a stint volunteering in a neuropsych lab, I know a bit about memory testing and have done some. I store memories just fine; it’s retrieval that’s the problem.) I consider this to be the best way to lose memories, as it means I have a chance of regaining access. If I wasn’t storing them when they happened, I’d be completely SOL.
Lamictal is what prevents my mania. If I start getting manic I’ll just sedate myself and then resume my former dose. Easy. I hope this works.
Therapy: haven’t had an appointment since my last update. I’ll have one tomorrow, though.
Cycling: still doing it, although not as much as I’d like. That whole reckless thing has made me a little scared to ride much. I’ll talk to my therapist about it.
I’ve resumed my daily walks, though. Because outdoor exercise of any kind helps my mental health.
Crafting: two inches left of Nephew’s pillow. I’ve been spinning a lot. Nothing else, though. I’ve been too busy reading.
Reading: alllll the books. So many books. Mostly paper ones. All non-fiction. Which reminds me, I should update my Goodreads account.
Cello: I’ve stopped lessons until January, so that I can afford school and Christmas presents. I’m sad, but I’ll be back to it in the new year.
Follow-up from last update: I had to reschedule the dentist, because I’ve been having some trouble with nausea. The craft fair this last Saturday was fun, although it was just me and Mom. I got a new journal. Now I just need to keep up with it.
Upcoming plans: Hiking November 11th! So excite!