When I made my last post (August 8th, ouch) I was doing well and had some energy and… I hate medication changes. My Trintellix dosage has been titrated to half of what it was, and I think maybe I need to go back up.
Today (technically yesterday, it’s 1:30am right now) I had my first cello lesson in a few weeks. I hadn’t played since my last lesson. Bad Switch, no cookie. But it was good. Toward the end we were doing a duet of the Jenny Lind Polka, and my conscious mind was just gone. It was an odd feeling. I had been lightheaded, and I just… see note, play note, no thinking. It’s not like I was lost in the music, but rather the opposite; like autopilot.
Overall I’ve lost ground, and have to have tape for my fourth finger position again. On the positive side, it helps me get into second position, although much to my amusement I did better at shifting once I stopped looking at my fingers. Yay for having a good ear. She decided that since pretty much every piece I’ve played in the Suzuki books lately has been bouncy, I get to do something more legato. So I’m on the chorus from Handel’s “Judas Maccabaeus.” I think I’m going to throw in some vibrato. I haven’t practiced that in a while.
Oh, and last lesson we worked on the Peter Murphy song. I need to finish it, still.
Crafting: I had started knitting an afghan for someone but changed my mind three balls in. So I sent the yarn back and have been focusing on the green and black shirt. It’s going to take a while: size six needles and a 54″ chest. Yeah, it’s a long-haul kind of project. Also doing some spinning. Haven’t used the sewing machine in a couple of weeks. Too much effort, given my emotional exhaustion. Knitting is as easy as picking up needles. I keep my spinning wheel next to my chair in the living room, and it requires no other tools. For sewing I have to clear the place settings off the dining table, get all the sewing gear out, make the thing(s) I want to make, pack all of it back up, and reset the table. I understand now why people have “sewing rooms.” I have three projects I want to do, two little ones (zippered change purses) and a big one (tote bag for my mom), and I think I can get all of it done fairly quickly if I can find the energy for setup and breakdown. But when I spend a week trying (and failing) to get up the spoons to go to the grocery store, sewing is just too much.
I’ve been disappearing into daydreams involuntarily, even more than usual. Yesterday it was so intrusive that it was exhausting and I had to sleep just to shut my brain up for a while. Ugh. Hopefully I will improve soon. I’m tired of not being able to focus on anything else.
I had signed up for a college class, like I said I would, but because of money issues I dropped it. I’ll start putting extra in my savings account so I can try again in spring.
I’ve done the research I need for my novel, but see above re: spoons.