First session of my final class!

I went to the first meeting of my class tonight. which is huge, because I was panicking at the thought of an in-person class. Absolutely fucking terrified. I could take it online, but I usually do better on classes when I do them in person. So I sucked it up and made myself go.

It was… not bad. and the cool girl who was in my last in-person class was there. This is her last class for her degree, too. (It’s the capstone class, one everyone has to take for a psych degree at my school.) We’ve decided to do our group project together, because neither of us want to do a group project. She’s thinking about waiting on grad school because she’s also a musician and she wants to go tour with her band for a year or two before settling down for her master’s. Oh, and she’s a lesbian and knows I’m trans. So yay!

This class is kind of interesting in that it’s so unbelievably basic. It’s like a refresher for Psych 101 that we all took as freshmen. The professor even said, “this is an easy class except for the paper you have to do.” Which we have all semester to work on. I already know what I want to do it on, if Cool Girl likes my topic. (Yes, we have to write a paper together. And here I previously liked this professor!) Tonight’s class was on “philosophers who inspired psychology” (mostly ancient Greeks with some Thomas Aquinas and Rene Descartes thrown in) and it was practically high-school level. I kept myself entertained by forcing myself not to jump into the lecture and tell the professor all the stuff I know that she was leaving out. I did speak up when she didn’t know what the four humors were called, though. Her first language is Spanish and she didn’t know what word to use in English, so I wasn’t correcting her, just being helpful. I hope.

After class the girl sitting across from me was all, “can I work with you?” and, well, earlier when we went around and introduced ourselves she didn’t seem to be the brightest bulb in the bunch. Her next sentence was, “and if you want to work alone, can you maybe give me an idea for my paper? Because I can’t think of one.” Sigh. I told her I would think about it, but later I asked Cool Girl instead, for she is intelligent and actually takes notes in class (unlike half the class, WTF). Also she won’t make me do all the work, which is good.  We swapped phone numbers and I’ll text her tomorrow.

There was also this guy.  He’s a fucking moron.  He was in my last in-person class too.  How he hasn’t failed out is beyond me.  The class started at 5:30.  He came crashing in at 6:30.  The prof, who was in the middle of the lecture, looked at him with mild incredulity and asked him if he was supposed to be in the class.  He gave her a big idiotic grin and said, “Yep!  I’m gonna graduate!”  I think everyone in the room wanted to slap him upside the head.  I know I wanted to, and the prof looked tempted herself.  This is the same guy who spent 15 minutes last year asking that class’ professor how to log into the student portal.  She would tell him, and he would get confused by “click on this link and enter your student ID number” and she’d explain it to him again, and finally she told him she couldn’t help him if he didn’t understand and he should call the helpdesk.  Seriously, 90% of our classes have an online component or else are completely online.  I really don’t understand why he hasn’t failed out yet.  Is it ableist to be pissed at someone for being a dumbass?  At least he didn’t talk during the lecture.  If he had I was ready to tell him to shut it.

So yeah, I went, and I’m proud of myself for not letting anxiety win today.  I can has cookie?

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